I feel flattered that some remember. The thoughtful suggestions and ideas on how to celebrate her birthday really surprised me. But am I ready to “celebrate” her birthday, knowing that she died on the same day?
I wish to be strong enough, as others keep on recalling, to prepare and organize something special. I just can’t wrap my head around it… maybe I’m not ready yet. Who is ready for that? Especially after seeing friends and colleagues celebrate their baby’s firsts? Is just a little too much for me at this time. It doesn’t mean that I’m not grateful or that I don’t acknowledge her life. It doesn’t mean that we don’t love her. We will always love her. But we can’t celebrate a birthday, just an anniversary of the happiest and saddest day of my life.
You can read Coral’s previous post here: